onmymind

My husband and I just spent some time on the Riviera Maya in Mexico to celebrate our honeymoon. We had a wonderful time.

 Neither of us had been anywhere before. Infact, it was the first time I had ever travelled via aeroplane - which was an experience unto itself.

 Prior to our departure came warnings from friends and family members who had been to mexico before; “Carefull for the locals harassing you on the beach”, “Don’t drink the water or ice”, “It’s a nice dry heat”. After these warnings let’s just say my poor husband was not looking forward to the trip at all!

Of course we didn’t have any issues at all. We stayed at the Gran Bahia Principe (a very large all inclusive resort housing three individual hotel complexes, a golf course and condos). It was so well secured that we had no problems with the locals at all. Only staff were allowed on site, with the exception of a small flea market the resort had allowed the local merchants to set up - where tourists were required to go to them.

The water and ice was all purified bottle water products. Even during the excursions, we ate at restaurants that practiced the same courtesy.

As for the weather… as long as we were at the beach or in the shade of a jungle, the weather was comfortable, but by the pool… HOT! My hair hated me. And in return, I hated my friend who advised me to unpack all of my hair products in order to save space and weight in my luggage. I had packed mostly sexy clothes, but let me tell you, it’s pretty hard to be sexy when your head looks like you have been electricuted. I was the bride of frankenstein all week! No wait… I was Gene Wilder!!!

We ate soooo much!

On site of each hotel there is a gormet buffet that is open four times a day. Outside of our oceanview room was a 24 hour snack bar. And everytime we turned our head there were all inclusive bars - some were even partially self serve. Mmm Pina Coladas… oh how I miss you.

The entertainment was plentiful - with the exeption of the hours between 4pm and 6pm. Which is also the time that the buffets were closed, so we often wandered around commenting on our bordom at this point. I suppose I could have taken those two hours to try to do something with my hair for the evening, but it probably would have been a lost cause anyway.

All in all, we had a blast and plan to ’drag’ a bunch of friends with us next time. WAY TOO FUN!!! 

We all have them. The people in our lives (as dominantly, or as in the background as they are) that we wish we never met, or the ones that we wish would give us that last reason to boycott them from our lives for good.

Is the reason that this person remains so apparent in our lives, because they are ‘fake’ (a “perfect” poster child of jealousy’s expectations)… and so, as a result, we feel that we could be considered to be superficial to let them go. Or maybe, it’s because he or she is just an ass… at least, most of the time? Either way, this person (or these people) are in our lives through some means or another (for some reason or another) and we wish they weren’t.

This person(s) may occupy our personal space often (i.e. family) or they may be a ‘fly by night pal’ (i.e. that chick your friend married). No matter what the reason, he or she is there taking up space on our calendar (due to their next birthday celebration), or is on our invitee list to the next baby shower that we’re throwing, because of the ‘common friend’.

Why???? Why do we allow these people take up our emotional space? Why do we do this to ourselves?

Why do we feel obligated to extend an invitation to these people to become a member of our personal lives? Seriously!!! I’m asking? Why is it that we can’t just say things like… “I’m Sorry, I am pretty sure that we have nothing in common!”… or, “Sorry, I really don’t like you for one reason or another!” and, as a result, help ourselves get rid of that stress provoked ‘soon to be ulcer’ building up inside?

Could it be because… we have had that one conversation (REMEMBER…THAT ONE TIME?) that was decent and pleasant?

Could it be because… we are afraid that this person (THIS ONE PERSON WHO YOU SO EXTREMELY DISLIKE AT THE MOMENT) will be the one and only person who shows up to comfort you at your death bed?

Or, could it be it’s because… you’re not as much of a jerk that you sometimes wish you were?

Whatever the reason, these people our in our lives… whether we like it or not… and I hate that.

This is just a random thought, which could later influence or relate to other thoughts. Make sure you FAVOITE my page, and check back often.

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I decided today to avoid the outside world and take up an old hobby – painting. For the first time in a LONG time I actually felt Zen. I got caught up in my own positive imagination for once to ease my mind, rather than my usual drug of watching a mediocre sitcom or cheesy movie to escape life’s pressures.

I realize that Karl Marx never wrote anything about sitcoms or
Hollywood in his manifesto, and I realize that people like Lenin and Stalin gave communism a bad wrap in their own sadistic ways, but I can’t help but feel like my ‘democratic’ social obligations have made me a stranger of my own self.

Like I said, today, I found myself exercising my ability to create. What an amazing feeling! Creating used to be such a major part of who I was that I, at one time, even considered making my creative talents a major part of my future. However, I became the victim of social expectations, and I decided that it would be more productive to my future and my family’s future to contribute in a more reliable way – let’s say by producing goods and/or services (ex. working for somebody else)… hence my University years.

I went into my adult life knowing that the average person will change careers 3-5 times in their adult lifespan. This knowledge, at the time, was a comfort to me (in knowing that what I decided to do in my early years did not ACTUALLY matter). I had talked myself into believing that it was okay to be unhappy in a career – after all, talent is only a hobby. So I would take ‘that job’ and make ‘that money’ and watch ‘that show’ and laugh at that ‘syndicated joke’, all for the sake of my future.

However, after today, I can’t help but wonder “What kind of a world would force me (predominantly) into a left-brained standard of living?” After all, approximately half of the world’s population is dominantly right-brained. So, therefore, shouldn’t 50% of our career options cater towards those of us who cringe at the thought of databasing and structured thought processes?

Yes, we were brought into this world to be treated equal… but let’s face it, we are not CREATED equal! We are all individuals learning to survive together. Perhaps we should segregate, at least enough, so that we can all get as much out of this life as we deserve? If we really were Democrats, then let’s face it, we would have equal opportunities to achieve success and happiness. If we don’t give everyone an equal chance at life’s prosperous allowances; if we sit idly by while others (who at one time would have been considered to be the worlds’ greatest minds) end up failing miserably in the streets or in asylums because their money hording society has no immediate need for them, then wouldn’t that make us capitalists?

I will leave you to research the differences of meanings.

… To be continued.

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I should start off this edition of “Why Americans Should NOT Envy the Canadian Healthcare System” by letting you know that, at least, in Ontario, Canada, we citizens are forced to sign a contract/legal document swearing that we will ONLY seek medical advice from ONE family doctor. I am sure that this began as a precaution to ensure that a single citizen is not bogarting multiple doctors when there are family’s out there without. This, if it were for sure a fact, could be considered a beneficial thing, but, as a negative, it means that Canadians have lost their say in concern with their ability to choose with whom to entrust their healthcare.

A family doctor in Canada is expected to act as the equivalent of a pediatrician / adult doctor / psychiatrist / OBGyn / Proctologist / and most every specialist you can think of. A family doctor is expected to be all of these things; however, I would like you to keep in mind that all of these types of doctors (specialists) are available separately in Canada.

Additionally, family doctors, as we Canadians dub them, are usually the basic graduates from medical school - they’ve learned the basics, but have not necessarily ‘specialized’. There are some of them available that have specialized (meaning extra education), but this usually ensures that they have not received all of their education within North America. In fact, it is usually after entering
North America that they have received their basic license to practice as a family physician… this is AFTER they’ve already received a license to specialize from another country – this is another issue unto itself that I may get into in a future blog. 

By all means, a family physician that has been previously licensed in another country is not a problem per-say, because all doctors are from different ilks, and all doctors have been proven to make mistakes, but it does mean a difficulty in successful communication between doctor and patient. And despite my own belief that all people should remain equal, can we really guarantee that a doctor from abroad will leave their cultural beliefs behind when treating a patient? After all, it’s hard enough to expect that a doctor from ‘home’ will be able to successfully leave their own personal morals at the examination room door. A mild example would include my own family doctors’ ‘comforting words’ in response to my concern about being able to conceive a child while having a thyroid problem… her response to me (which I can only assume stemmed from her religious and/or homeland beliefs – anything but her medical know-how) was simply that my concerns of fertility DID NOT matter. Her reasoning only included that ‘because I was not to be married for another week and two days, we (my fiancé and I) were not to be concerned with our ability to conceive children until after then’. Hmm was this her wanting me to make yet another appointment in two weeks? (See “Why Americans Should NOT Envy the Canadian Healthcare System (PART ONE - A Basic Doctor’s Appointment) Or was this the result of her own (non-medical) beliefs - the same beliefs that made her feel that it was appropriate to hang a giant ‘Jesus on the Cross’ statue in her old waiting room – the one she had before she recently moved into this new ‘walk-in-clinic’ environment. 

One cannot help but wonder what the possible reasons why we Canadians are lacking in available family doctors. Yes, a major reason is probably the difference in pay that our country offers in comparison to the country to the south of us, but could it also include the fact that our doctors are not expected exemplify the type of care and concern for a patient that is deserved within a single visit – therefore these doctors are awarded with a revisit? Could the Canadian family physicians’ overall ‘lack of interest’ in their patients be enforced by the fact that (despite how they treat and care for their patients) they get paid no matter what, AND continue to be ensured of future appointments/paychecks for ‘re-seeing’ the same patients that they have ignored before?

No matter what the reason, we Canadians find that these doctors’ paychecks have been blatantly pre-guaranteed by the Canadian government… NO MATTER WHAT!

(Ergo) The Canadian family doctor has a guaranteed paycheck… a paycheck that is rewarded by the almighty mountainous Canadian tax dollar… a tax that, through the permission of a group of poorly elected officials that reside in our country’s capital city (despite the satisfaction of the Canadians who pay these taxes), is supposed to ensure an equal opportunity for ALL Canadians to have equal access to worthy healthcare.

And so…BECAUSE THEY CAN:

…family doctors, in Canada, ensure the financial wellbeing of themselves OVER the overall wellbeing of their patients by making Canadians (at least Ontarians) sign a legal document swearing that they cannot look outside of their office for medical opinions.

…family doctors, in Canada, are less likely to recommend a specialist, and instead offer 3 minutes of their time and get paid for 10 minutes.

…family doctors, in Canada, purposefully do not send their patients to specialists in order to hoard as much available ‘healthcare’ money for themselves.

In conclusion, it seems that family doctors, in Canada, are NOT expected to fulfill their Hippocratic Oath – BECAUSE THEY CAN!

Has anyone else ever noticed how the much the words ‘Hippocratic’ and ‘Hypocrite’ are so much alike?

May I please leave you at this point of the series with a copy of the modern Hippocratic Oath:

I swear to fulfill, to the best of my ability and judgment, this covenant:I will respect the hard-won scientific gains of those physicians in whose steps I walk, and gladly share such knowledge as is mine with those who are to follow.I will apply, for the benefit of the sick, all measures [that] are required, avoiding those twin traps of overtreatment and therapeutic nihilism.I will remember that there is art to medicine as well as science, and that warmth, sympathy, and understanding may outweigh the surgeon’s knife or the chemist’s drug.I will not be ashamed to say “I know not,” nor will I fail to call in my colleagues when the skills of another are needed for a patient’s recovery.I will respect the privacy of my patients, for their problems are not disclosed to me that the world may know. Most especially must I tread with care in matters of life and death. If it is given me to save a life, all thanks. But it may also be within my power to take a life; this awesome responsibility must be faced with great humbleness and awareness of my own frailty. Above all, I must not play at God.

If you are familiar with Canadian issues at all, you would know that one nearing the top of the list is the shortage of doctors available and the growing number of citizens without a primary health care worker (aka ‘family physician’) to monitor any health issues they may have (from colds to cancer).

Thankfully I am currently one of the “lucky” citizens who has a family doctor - “lucky” being in parentheses for a reason. Let me tell you just how “lucky” I am.

A typical visit to the doctor’s office, if I even bother to make an appointment, begins with entering what is designed to look like a walk-in clinic. But whatever you do, DO NOT just walk in – they will refuse to see you! Then, once I sign in for my 9 AM appointment, I sit for an average of 2 hours before I am even ushered into a cubical sized examination room. This always confuses me, because, at 9 AM, I am the first appointment of the day! So I sit and stare at the walls and try to avoid the germ ridden magazines (that have seen many a snot covered hand in their five year shelf life). I watch the nurses walk around aimlessly - telling each other the latest joke that they’ve heard, or discussing their child’s soccer tournament. One time I sat and watched a nurse carrying around a MacLeans magazine, showing it to other nurses, and scoffing at the cover story “Your Dog Can Get Better Healthcare than You”. I watched them laugh, looked again at the clock and thought to myself “Well duh!!!”. 

Eventually I will see the doctor far back in the hallway beyond the check-in counter. I think to myself “Oh there she is… with her coat on… being welcomed by the nurses… and it is now 10:15 AM!”. Now that she has finally arrived, it’s time for her to finish her coffee. She tries to hide in the back, but I can sometimes see her doing JUST that! Then once she’s let the coffee settle, she makes her way to the check-in counter/nurse’s station and proceeds to tell them the latest joke that she’s heard and discusses her child’s soccer tournament. She disappears out of sight again for a little while and comes back wearing her official white coat. Now she’s speaking quietly so that all of us in the waiting room can’t hear. I can only assume that she is being conferenced on the number of patients who have either left or who have threatened to walk out, because of having to wait so long. Twenty minutes or so later I will FINALLY be called to a room. Almost instantly she will join me, smile and say “Hello.”. She quickly follows her greeting by asking me why it is that I am “visiting today”. I think to myself “In all of that time you took to see me, you couldn’t have opened my chart and found that out for yourself?” As frusterating as this can be, my favorite instance is when she is the one who calls me in for an ‘emergency’ appointment (for example - to discuss test results) and after I’ve arrived she, EVEN THEN, has no clue why I have come to her office. 

Since by now I am used to doing her job and monitoring my own health care, I will pull out a little slip of paper so that I remember to tell her all of the things that she wanted to discuss with me. She sits down and sighs and then proceeds to tell me to “hurry up”. And let’s me know that she doesn’t have time to talk about more than one thing. So I try to fool her and make it sound like, at least a couple of the issues, are the same thing. Kind of like the guests always did on the Montel Williams show when they were chosen to ask Sylvia Brown only one question. My doctor will go with it for a moment, but then cuts me off and runs out of the room. And after this flash moment is over, I realize that SHE NEVER ANSWERED A SINGLE QUESTION – nor did she examine me! So I proceed back to the nurse’s station to make another appointment… so that my doctor can once again have a chance for to ACTUALLY ‘care for’ me.

I stare down through the tiny window at the secretary fiddling with paper clips, taking sips of her tea and reorganizing the same pile of papers a dozen times – seemingly doing anything to avoid eye contact. Eventually she looks up and snarls with a simple “Yes?”. I request an appointment and try to seem as pleasant as possible (in hopes that this will, one day, help her not act like such a fill in the blank). And then my favorite part happens. After a couple of entries into the database of her plasma screened computer, she looks up at me and asks “What is this appointment for?” ARRRRGGGG!!! I tell her, although I am convinced that she only asks for her own benefit, and so that all of the waiting patients can hear. Thankfully I’ve never had to make an appointment for something embarrassing. I tell her anyway, and know that my doctor will ask me the very same question… when I see her again… like always.

… To be continued.

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As I introduce myself to today.com, let me introduce myself to you. My name is Mandy. I am 27… oh no wait, I am 28. I live in a small town north of Lake Erie that has earned the nickname of ‘the armpit’ of the county. My living room is red (not all that relevant to who I am, but it’s something to know). I am a lover of all things creative, and being a Leo, I am also a lover of all things provocative (no not sexually, but that can be fun too). What I’m getting at is that I like to challenge the way that people think.

So if you haven’t guessed it yet, this is what my blogs are going to hopefully do… make you think – or in the very least, entertain you. Sometimes you will read simply about things like my issues with “Sunday Drivers”, other times I may get a little close to the line and talk about the more controversial subjects such as religion and politics – ooooooh! In either extreme I hope to spark something in you that will either make you stand up and cheer, or shake you fist. Either way I look forward to reading your comments.

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